But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize