ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
