Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize