i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Randomize