Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Randomize
