Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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