remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
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