The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
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