Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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