STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
