"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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