Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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