It's Friday. Sex?
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize
