guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
