She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
