Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
