Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
