no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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