He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
its liver damage thursday
Randomize