i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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