Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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