We're facebook friends in real life
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
In other news, I just burned my penis
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
