just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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