Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
