I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
