Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
