Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I showed him my bush... on skype.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Randomize
