Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Randomize
