am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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