today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
she pinky promised me she was 18
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
