NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
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