VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
