i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
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