Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
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