I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
