I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
