ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
