and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
