some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize