did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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