I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
tell me about the fingering
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