just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Randomize
