OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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