Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
