Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
