yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
