I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
i just had sex bonerless
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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