He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
