He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
You made out with two different species that night
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Randomize
