Bisexual people are plain selfish.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
They took my balls.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize
