i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
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